mother of one for a day

Let me preface this entry with the fact that I love my three and a half year old to pieces. More than I can say. I'm crazy about her and she makes me laugh and breaks my heart almost every day. However, she's been busy with relatives for most of today and yesterday and I've had a very sweet time with little Eli. There are so many things that I rush through, with him being Child No. 2 and for the past 48 hours, I've tried to slow down and just enjoy watching him. I don't think I've complained out loud more than twice about having to rescue him from under a chair, grab him just before he enters the fireplace, or remove various objects from his mouth. I've given him my undivided attention while he shows me how he can push Anna's dolls in her grocery cart back and forth from the bathroom to the hall. About 50 times. I've taken more time just watching him and talking to him. And he's reciprocated. He's been much more snuggly. It's as if he realized he has me all to himself and is taking advantage of every minute.

Some moms handle having more than one child with grace. A grace that I long to achieve someday. I still haven't gotten over the shift of focus from one child to two. The mental exhaustion that comes from juggling my thoughts around two (a walking baby that's always inches from getting into a fix and a three year old with your common three year old meltdowns and expectations for me to be in character half the day--from Peter Pan to Ma Ingalls) is just not easing up.

So I revel in my one-on-one time with my children because I feel like they finally get to be with the Real Me. The Me that I miss and hope returns sometime soon. Maybe with Eli's coming birthday, I'll feel a sense of accomplishment and gratefulness that will push me over into a more hopeful, graceful era. And the fact that he's slept past 7am these past two mornings, isn't hurting one little bit. I want this rest and renewal for myself, but I also want it for my family. They need me to be joyful.

Our yard

One thing I have been working hard on is our yard and my various little flower beds. It's something I enjoy so much and if I was able to devote even a tenth of the energy I spend just thinking about gardening to the actual practice of doing it, I'd probably have a rose named after me by now. I love that it's something I can work on in bits and pieces and not feel like I'm working towards completion exactly. I can put Eli in his porch swing and pull weeds for 5 minutes and feel really good. **Look carefully at the middle photo. This smidgen of work doesn't leave me with a table full of half-finished projects. There's not a lot of planning or cleaning up to do afterwards. It's perfect. And I realize it's something I do almost completely for my own enjoyment. While it would be nice to receive a few compliments on my yard, it occurred to me that I hardly ever do, but the fact that this just now occurred to me must be a good sign. In one way.

A little history of our yard. (Hold on to your hats--what excitement!!) We bought our house in the fall of 2001 and the following spring/early summer, we discovered a leaky exterior water pipe. This led to some grueling work for Matt: digging in the hot sun. Digging maybe 5 feet down to reach the pipe in question. And digging from the house to the middle of the yard, straight across and under the central steps, creating a path (or trench) of mud and destruction. It wasn't a spectacular yard to begin with, just grass, a border of liriope, and some redtips. I was holding my breath for a few flowering surprises that first spring, but was left with just a single pincushion flower in the back (which returned two weeks ago, with a partner, for the first time since 2002!). Our front yard is on the small side so since about a fourth of it was now dug up and a good third of the grass was gone, we decided to go ahead and essentially start over. With the help of my parents, we got rid of all the grass, planted two red maples, and an assortment of shrubs and flowers. I'd give just about anything to go back in time and make some different choices as to plant type or placement. (i.e WHY 2 maples and not a crabapple or a dogwood?) But I'm very happy that our work has paid off and since I've added to it every spring and fall, we now have a happy assortment of plants. Here are the highlights:

Shrub that makes my nose the happiest: Tea Olive (Osmanthus fragrans). I grew up with this smell greeting me outside our carport door. I LOVE this smell. Oddly, Matt can't smell it at all!

Most surprising: I had no idea the Butterfly Bush would grow so tall, so fast. It takes up a large chunk of the front corner and I wish I could be Mary Poppins and just point my finger and magically move it somewhere else (in addition, my daughter would be very pleased with this coveted trait).

Most dear: My daylilies don't do a lot of blooming, but they have a good story to tell. They were transplanted from my parents yard, straight from the pet cemetery. I like to think that I have a bit of Patches, Wags, Daisy, Allie, Hobo, Hobo II, Hobo III, Big Eyes, and many goldfish in my patch of green daylily leaves.

Thriving: Several guaras. They're taller than me and add so much life to the front yard this year.

Brand New: The Good Ol' Summertime rosebush given to me by three sweet friends, in memory of my grandmother. It produced its first blossom last week!

Lately Added: Tigerlily bulbs straight from the yard of a 91 year old watchmaker from Macon. (And Anna's "best friend.") Also added: creeping phlox, thyme, blue plumbago, more salvia.

Most Changed: What were once blue hydrangeas turned pink shortly after we learned our first child was to be a girl.

Questionable: The beautiful rosebush given to me by a dear family a few birthdays ago. It's leaves often get nibbled at.

Strangely commemorative: The Cecil Breuner climbing rose which happened to get planted the day of my really bad car accident last May, maybe the scariest day of my life.

Goners: Two oakleaf hydrangeas, one broadleaf hydrangea, one pee-wee hydrangea, one camelia, and countless perennials. (I didn't do enough research about how these would hold up in our hot afternoon sun).

I could go on but since I've put my few readers to sleep, I will stop. Thank you for indulging me.

strawberry cake

apparently, amy has received numerous requests for this recipe. and since i've been feeling way too in over my head with daily life, this gives me incentive to re-learn how to log into my blogger account (so sad) and write a quick post.

i had to remember where i was when amy called for the recipe. oh yes, giving one of the kids a bath. so i retraced my steps and there was the recipe card, in a basket next to the bathtub.

this recipe comes from my mom's very good friend, carol, who she grew up with in florida. at a young age, carol started cooking for her family of 7 and this dessert apparently was made a good bit as it became a favorite of my mom's. in carol's recipe book, she even has my mom's name written next to this cake. when i asked my mom the history of the cake, she got a little choked up telling me that part. and my mom never forgets where a recipe comes from and gives credit where credit is due every time she makes something, even if it's on a weekly basis: "we're having maxine's rice with sue's good salad tonight" is commonly heard.

without further ado, here's how it reads on the recipe written up by my mom:

HERE'S WHAT'S COOKIN': STRAWBERRY JELLO CAKE
RECIPE FROM: MOM

(BEST TO MAKE A DAY OR 2 AHEAD) * i've never made it more than a day ahead*

1 BOX WHITE OR STRAWBERRY CAKE MIX *we love using strawberry cake mix*
1 CUP OIL
4 EGGS
10 OUNCES FROZEN STRAWBERRIES *here's where amy recommends the real thing*
(5 OZ FOR CAKE; 5 OZ FOR FROSTING)
3 OUNCES STRAWBERRY JELLO

STIR OIL IN CAKE MIX. LIGHTLY BEAT EGGS AND ADD TO CAKE MIX.
STIR IN 5 OZ OF STRAWBERRIES.
MIX IN DRY JELLO.
BAKE IN 2 CAKE PANS 25-30 MINUTES AT 350.
COOL AND FROST.

FROSTING:
1 POUND CONFECTIONERY SUGAR
1/4 POUND SOFT BUTTER (1 STICK)
1/8 TEASPOON SALT
1 TEASPOON VANILLA
3-4 TABLESPOON JUICE FROM STRAWBERRIES

BEAT SUGAR AND BUTTER TOGETHER. ADD SALT AND VANILLA AND JUICE. ADD DRAINED STRAWBERRIES. FROST. REFRIGERATE.

i've served this cake at each of my daughter's three birthdays. i suppose it's our tradition now. i think the close-up is actually from my husband's birthday, though, since he's also quite a fan. i began putting the sweet little birds on top at anna's first birthday, loving how they looked with the pink. and what do you know, they were a gift from amy.

enjoy the yummy cake!